Hi David,
Obviously it makes sense to do something as you are dropping a minimum of 1.125% on the loan even if you take the 4.75% option. That being said the comparison comes in between points paid vs. further discount to the rate. Here goes -
@ 288k, paying .50 points you drop .25% in interest rate (from 4.75 to 4.50), it's going to take a hair over 2 years to recoup this additional cost. You are paying $1440 to save around $720 to start. Your interest savings will diminish slightly as you pay your balance down, but either way, if you are planning on 5 years, you're better off with option 2 vs. option 1.
It makes no sense to take option 3, as you are adding an additional .75% in discount to drop only an additional .125 in rate. This is going to take more than 5 years to recoup, so it's beyond your timeframe, I wouldn't bother with this option.
As for paying the costs, or rolling them in, thats more a matter of preference. If you roll them in, you will be paying interest on that money, but the interest on 4k is only about $15 a month. If you have the money laying around and don't need it for a cushion (ie - you have plenty of other assets) pay the money at closing, otherwise roll them in. It should directly change your refi either way.
Looks like, in your situation, option 2 (or 5 if you want to roll them in) is the best route for you, given your situation.
AC